Random Birthday Thought

As much as it pains me to admit this, today I turn 29.

Sure I'm grateful I'm not in New Orleans or Iraq and all that other stuff that really makes live difficult to live. However, there are existential crises that one also has to weather.

I'm not at all where I thought I'd be by this point in my life; I thought I'd be married, and have a career doing...something.
Instead I'm painfully single and working at a job that is just a job without much future or fulfillment.

I thought that by this point in my life I'd know who I was and what my place was in this world. Instead I feel more confused and unsure than ever.

Of course in some ways I do know myself better and I do have more of an inkling of what the hell I'm doing on this planet, but no where near in the amounts I had hoped.

And then it's always a surprise who remembers.
I've had friends from childhood forget and friends from the past 5 years remember; I got a call from Australia and a card from a coworker. So far 3 of my 6 siblings have remembered and thankfully so did my mother.

Three people have made very serious statements about how much my friendship means to them, which is always nice. And 2 of the people I'd hoped to hear from but not really expected to, fulfilled my expectations and remained silent.

Next year is the big one, the big 3-0 as they call it.
If I am no longer living in LA, I think I'll be able to call my 30th year on this planet successful.